Deadline: Columbia Pictures Takes Teddy Wayne’s New Thriller Novel The Winner, Amy Pascal Producing” (Mar. 13, 2024)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Voice-Overs from ‘Sex and the Space Station'” (Aug. 21, 2023)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “A Network Executive Writes a Sitcom” (June 12, 2023)

The Bookseller: The Winner announcement (May 22, 2023)

Amazon Book Review: interview (Oct. 14, 2022)

Literary Hub: interview (July 26, 2022)

The Riverfront Times” profile (July 19, 2022)

The New York Times: By the Book interview (July 17, 2022)

Time: “Raising Kids When the World Is Ending” (July 13, 2022)

Otherppl podcast: interview (July 13, 2022)

The Millions: interview (July 12, 2022)

A Correction podcast: interview (July 12, 2022)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Live in My Head for a Very Low Rent, Albeit Not Free!” (July 12, 2022)

McSweeney’s: “The Earliest Adopters of Bitrock” (July 12, 2022)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Tucker Carlson on the Alien Invasion” (May 9, 2022)

Publishers Weekly: “Teddy Wayne’s New Novel Enters the Culture Wars” (Apr. 29, 2022)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Constitutional Crisis No. 1” (Jan. 3 & 10, 2022)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Succession, Jr.” (Nov. 22, 2021)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “The Age of Monsters” (Sept. 27, 2021)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Bad Elevator Pitches” (July 28, 2021)

McSweeney’s: “Teachable Moments With the Anti-Vaxxer Family” (May 13, 2021)

McSweeney’s: “714 Epidemiologists on When We Can Resume Fixating on Petty Bullshit” (Feb. 25, 2021)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Hibernation Insomnia” (Jan. 2, 2021)

Air Mail: “If Trump Had Been Our World War II President” (Oct. 31, 2020)

McSweeney’s: “A Quiet Evening at Home with Don, Jr. and Kimberly” (Oct. 26, 2020)

Washington University in St. Louis The Source: profile (Oct. 12, 2020)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Small Talk in 1348” (Aug. 3 & 10, 2020)

Air Mail: Tracking an Apocalypse” (July 11, 2020)

Air Mail: “The Titanic Daily Task-Force Briefing” (May 16, 2020)

The Maris Review: interview (Apr. 23, 2020)

Forbes: interview (Apr. 15, 2020)

McSweeney’s: “I Just Don’t Think a Trump Has What It Takes to Be President” (Mar. 3, 2020)

New York Times Family: “Raising a Nontoxic Man” (Feb. 28, 2020)

Lit Hub: “What I’ve Learned Interviewing Almost 300 Writers Over Seven Years” (Feb. 25, 2020)

McSweeney’s: “I Hate Trump’s Awful Policies, But I Love That He’s a Huge Asshole” (Feb. 24, 2020)

The Los Angeles Times: interview (Feb. 20, 2020)

The Millions: interview (Feb. 12, 2020)

Air Mail: “The Canadian” (Feb. 8, 2020)

McSweeney’s: “Emotionally Haunted House” (Oct. 24, 2019)

New York Times Book Review: The Liar by Ayelet Gundar-Goshen (Oct. 1, 2019)

McSweeney’s: Hey, I’m Beto, Your Dorm Resident Advisor” (May 9, 2019)

New York Times Op-Ed: “My Daily Routine: Jasper Newman, 8 Months Old” (Feb. 22, 2019)

Deadline Hollywood: “HBO Developing ‘Loner’ Drama Based On Teddy Wayne Novel” (Feb. 19, 2019)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Carterism” (Jan. 14, 2019)

New York Times Op-Ed: “The United Texts of America” (Oct. 3, 2018)

McSweeney’s: “A Time Traveler Goes Back in Time to the Birth of Baby Hitler But Gets the Wrong Baby” (Sept. 26, 2018)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Political Songs of the Summer” (Aug. 24, 2018)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Young Rudy Giuliani Defends Himself” (Aug. 2, 2018)

The New Yorker Radio Hour: “I Work Hard and I Play Soft” (June 15, 2018)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Rules for WITCH HUNT!: The Board Game” (June 2, 2018)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Are My Friends Really My Friends?” (May 12, 2018)

McSweeney’s: “More Appropriate White House Correspondents’ Association Dinner Jokes for 2019” (Apr. 30, 2018)

The New Yorker Radio Hour: “The Right to Bear W.M.D.s” (Apr. 27, 2018)

McSweeney’s: “GOP Retirement Announcement Template” (Apr. 12, 2018)

Literary Hub: “5 Writers, 7 Questions, No Wrong Answers” (Feb. 13, 2018)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Engulfed in the Artificial Audioscape” (Feb. 9, 2018)

McSweeney’s: “I’m Some Guy’s Ill-Informed Political Twitter Thread” (Feb. 2, 2018)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “A Stormtrooper Reconsiders His Support for Snoke” (Jan. 11, 2018)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “I’m a Proud Nuclear Missile Owner” (Dec. 18 and 25, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “The World According to Trump” (Nov. 30, 2017)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Choose Your Own Public Apology” (Nov. 24, 2017)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Amazon Key Is a Lot Less Scary Than My Post-1-Click Remorse” (Oct. 28, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “247 Ball: Luxury Gentrification in an Up-and-Coming Neighborhood!” (Oct. 25, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Comedy II” (Oct. 12, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Forgiveness” (Sept. 14, 2017)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: What We Talk About When We Talk About and Exactly Like Trump” (Sept. 8, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Home” (Aug. 24, 2017)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Grandpa Had a Pension. This Generation Has Cryptocurrency.” (Aug. 3, 2017)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Mr. Anthony Scaramucci Esq.’s Guide to Workplace Etiquette” (July 28, 2017)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Thanks to Venmo, We Now All Know How Cheap Our Friends Are” (July 21, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Comedy” (July 14, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Presence” (June 22, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “We Are All Living in a Computer Simulation” (June 12, 2017)

New York Times Op-Ed: “The White House Leak Template for Journalists” (June 10, 2017)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Social Insecurity? Internet Turns Boomers Into Twits” (May 5, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Self-Care Ideas for President Trump” (Apr. 6, 2017)

McSweeney’s: Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Measurements” (Apr. 4, 2017)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Perverse Thrill of Chaotic Times” (Mar. 25, 2017)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Development Hell” (Mar. 18, 2017)

The Bridge: “Easy Money-saving Tips for the Discriminating Hipster” (Mar. 13, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy’s Unpopular Proverbs: Priorities” (Mar. 10, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Striking” (Feb. 22, 2017)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Culture of Nastiness” (Feb. 19, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Grok’s Press Conference” (Feb. 7, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Laughter III” (Feb. 3, 2017)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “The King’s New Year’s Fitness Journal” (Jan. 14, 2017)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Journeys” (Jan. 4, 2017)

New York Times Arts: “Solstice Serenades in New York City for Make Music Winter” (Dec. 24, 2016)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “We’re Expecting a Sofa!” (Dec. 20, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The ‘H-Bomb’ Fizzles: The Harvard Brand Takes a Hit” (Dec. 11, 2016)

The Guardian: “Literary Mixtape: Teddy Wayne on Songs of Desire and Obsession” (Dec. 8, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Every News Article for the Next Four Years” (Nov. 28, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: What Is a TinyLetter? Like Ye Olde Blog, But Less Public” (Nov. 13, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “The Vast Left-Wing Conspiracy” (Nov. 7, 2016)

Slate: “Inside Locker Rooms and Other Male Spaces” (Oct. 19, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Generals” (Oct. 10, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Awkward Sex, Onscreen and Off” (Oct. 9, 2016)

Interview: “Five Obsessive Characters” (Sept. 19, 2016)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Extraterrestrial Book-Jacket Blurbs” (Sept. 13, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “That Time I Published a Personal Essay on the Internet” (Sept. 13, 2016)

LitHub: “Teddy Wayne is Worried He Might Be a Fraud” (Sept. 13, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Credit” (Sept. 12, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Trauma of Violent News on the Internet” (Sept. 11, 2016)

NPR Weekend Edition: “Teddy Wayne’s Loner Paints A Chilling Study Of The Effects Of ‘Toxic Masculinity'” (interview)

Electric Literature: “Loneliness, Desire, Obsession: Teddy Wayne’s Literary Mixtape” (Sept. 9, 2016)

New York Times Book Review: “Nathan Hill’s The Nix (Sept. 4, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Barns” (Aug. 30, 2016)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Voting Narcissistic Sociopath — Until Now” (Aug. 28, 2016)

Vanity Fair: “D, the Donald Magazine” (Sept. 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Volunteerism” (Aug. 15, 2016)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “This is Your Neurotic Captain Speaking” (Aug. 8, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Spouse in the Next Room” (Aug. 7, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Lust” (July 21, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The End of Reflection” (June 14, 2016)

Vanity Fair: “11 Famous Presidential Quotes…If They Were Said by Donald Trump” (June/July 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Fences” (May 31, 2016)

New York Times Book Review: “Programmed Obsolescence” (May 22, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Familiarity” (May 3, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Right to Privacy for Children Online” (Apr. 17, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Lunch” (Apr. 4, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Holdouts of the Social Media Age” (Mar. 27, 2016)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: A Certain Word Is Really Getting on My Nerves” (Mar. 14, 2016)

Vanity Fair: “The Next Independent Candidate for President” (Mar. 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Stars” (Mar. 11, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Waiting II” (Feb. 26, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Flies” (Feb. 11, 2016)

The New Yorker Shorts & Murmurs (video): “Socially Awkward Dance Moves” (Jan. 27, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Buses” (Jan. 5, 2016)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Fractions” (Dec. 14, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “A Holiday Wish List (as in ‘I Wish I Never Got This’)” (Dec. 13, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Our (Bare) Shelves, Ourselves” (Dec. 6, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Microcomplaint: Nothing Too Small to Whine About” (Nov. 15, 2015)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “The Legend of the Donald” (Oct. 28, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “‘NPR Voice’ Has Taken Over the Airwaves” (Oct. 25, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Politness” (Oct. 16, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Found on Facebook: Empathy” (Oct. 11, 2015)

New York Times Book Review: “Padgett Powell’s ‘Cries for Help, Various'” (Oct. 4, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Death of the Party” (Sept. 17, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Fathers” (Sept. 10, 2015)

Vanity Fair: “Courtesy Counts–On the Inside, Too” (Sept. 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Haste” (Aug. 3, 2015)

Interview Magazine: “Gal Gadot “ (Aug. 2015)

New York Times Op-Ed: “You Go, Guy!” (July 19, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Exceptions” (July 14, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: A Eulogy for the Long, Intimate Email” (July 11, 2015)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “How Smartphones Would have Changed World History” (July 3, 2015)

Barnes & Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Headier Start” (June 24, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Temperature” (June 10, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: These Days Are Writing Their Own Tickets” (June 7, 2015)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Mark Zuckerberg is the Greatest and Facebook is the Best” (May 21, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Dreams” (May 14, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Tell-Tale Signs of the Modern-Day Yuppie” (May 8, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Philanthropy” (May 4, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Lateness” (Apr. 21, 2015)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Customer #0045, or Hillary Clinton’s Burrito Bowl” (Apr. 15, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Death” (Apr. 9, 2015)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Kama Sutra for the Cramped Studio Apartment” (Apr. 8, 2015)

Barnes & Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “The Total Insanity Workout” (Apr. 6, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “The Childless Life” (Apr. 5, 2015)

Vanity Fair: “The Apps of God” (Apr. 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Clichés” (Mar. 26, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Lemons” (Mar. 18, 2015)

New York Times Book Review: review of The Last Flight of Poxl West (Mar. 15, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Let’s Tidy Up This Sex Dungeon!” (Mar. 5, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Shutterbug Parents and Overexposed Lives” (Feb. 22, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Boasting” (Feb. 6, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Quantity” (Jan. 29, 2015)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Crying” (Jan. 6, 2015)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Unending Anxiety of an ICYMI World” (Jan. 2, 2015)

Barnes & Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Celebrate New Year’s Day With Us!” (Dec. 29, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Rapid Decline of the Movie Quotation” (Dec. 14, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “North Korea Reviews ‘The Interview'” (Dec. 10, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Three Things Only People Who Can’t Understand Anything Will Understand” (Dec. 8, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The Branding of Literature” (Nov. 30, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Get on My Lawn!” (Nov. 21, 2014)

Barnes & Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “It Was the Crest® of Times” (Nov. 19, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Horses” (Nov. 12, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Swiping Them Off Their Feet” (Nov. 9, 2014)

New York Times Op-Ed: “The Terrible 32s” (Nov. 2, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Candles” (Oct. 28, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Foolishness II” (Oct. 13, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Commenting Comment: A Magazine Dedicated to Internet Comments” (Oct. 8, 2014)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine realeased in South Korea (Oct. 1, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Waiting” (Sept. 29, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Differences Between Me, Teddy Wayne, and Bruce Wayne/John Wayne” (Sept. 22, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Disrupting the Playground” (Sept. 21, 2014)

New novel sold to Simon & Schuster for publication in 2016 (Aug. 27, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Hate” (Aug. 25, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Of Myself I Sing” (Aug. 24, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Water” (Aug. 13, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Timmy and Pete Buy Some Books: A Short Film from Amazon” (Aug. 7, 2014)

New York Times Op-Ed: “A Parchment on Millennials” (Aug. 2, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Hay” (July 28, 2014)

Screenplay Likable Characters, cowritten with Amber Dermont, accepted to the IFP RBC’s Emerging Storytellersproject forum (July 23, 2014)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine published in Hungary (July 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Thought” (July 10, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Clicking Their Way to Outrage” (July 6, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Patience II” (June 24, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: At the Tone, Leave a What?” (June 15, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Patience” (June 12, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Heart II” (June 5, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Possession” (May 19, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Cobblers” (May 7, 2014)

New York Observer: “Teddy Wayne’s Summer Television Guide” (May 5, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Life Is Streaming Past You” (May 4, 2014)

La ballata di Jonny Valentine published in Italy by Minimum Fax (Apr. 30, 2014)

New York Observer: “Cathouse: A Drama at Lady Dinah’s Cat Emporium in One Act” (Apr. 29, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Mastery” (Apr. 29, 2014)

Barnes & Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “The Viralizer” (Apr. 24, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Dear Senate Intelligence Committee Report on the Use of Torture” (Apr. 15, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Taxes” (Apr. 15, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: On Internet Slang, IMHO” (Mar. 30, 2014)

New York Times Book Review: The Love Song of Jonny Valentine on Paperback Row (Mar. 30, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Wisdom II” (Mar. 12, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: Celebrities Behaving Well” (Mar. 9, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Oysters” (Mar. 6, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “The Heterosexual Agenda” (Feb. 26, 2014)

New York Times Book Review: “Out of Character” (Feb. 23, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Business Date” (Feb. 21, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Bridesmaids” (Feb. 19, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Future Tense: The 7-Day Digital Diet” (Feb. 9, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Leopards” (Feb. 5, 2014)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine now available in paperback (Feb. 4, 2014)

New York Times Opinionator: “Dissecting a Frog: How to Write a Humor Piece” (Feb. 4, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “On the Internet, Nobody Knows You’re a Human Who’s Turned into a Dog”(Feb. 4, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “The Saccharine Method” (Feb. 3, 2014)

Rookie Mag: excerpt of the Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Feb. 3, 2014)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Hard-Boiled” (Jan. 31, 2014)

Salon: “Super Bowl 2064: All Hail Emperor Bieber!” (Jan. 31, 2014)

Interview Magazine: “Taylor Kitsch” (Feb. 2014)

McSweeney’s: “I’m a Busy Mom in a TV Commercial for Household Products” (Jan. 27, 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Price” (Jan. 23, 2014)

El Pais ICON (Spain): “‘Queremos que los niños prodigio ardan para decir que la fama no da la felicidad'” (Jan. 13, 2014)

El Mundo (Spain): “‘Ser especial en Estados Unidos es una maldición'” (Jan. 13, 2014)

Offline Magazine: “Prefatory Remarks” (Issue 2, Jan. 2014)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Couples” (Jan. 13, 2014)

GQ: “Korean Central Broadcasting System Presents Basket-Ball Night with Inferior American Basket-Ball Athletes”(Jan. 8, 2014)

New York Times Magazine Lives: “Repercussions” (Jan. 5, 2014)

New York Times Styles: “Call Waiting…and Waiting” (Jan. 5, 2014)

El Diario (Spain): “La cultura pop se mira el ombligo” (Dec. 31, 2013)

ABC cultural (Spain): “Entre Dylan y Justin Bieber” (Dec. 25, 2013)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Santacare Is Coming to Town” (Dec. 22, 2013)

Playground Mag (Spain): “los 25 mejores libros de ficción del año” (Dec. 20, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: History” (Dec. 19, 2013)

El Confidencial (Spain): “La mejor cosecha literaria” (Dec. 14, 2013)

Rolling Stone (Spain): interview (Dec. 4, 2013)

Gonzoo (Spain): “Odiar a Justin Bieber, amar a Justin Bieber” (Dec. 4, 2013)

Blisstopic (Spain): review (Dec. 4, 2013)

El Confidencial (Spain): “Reírse de Justin Bieber es demasiado fácil” (Dec. 3, 2013)

BookPage names The Love Song of Jonny Valentine one of its top 10 books of 2013 (Dec. 2, 2013)

New York Times: “Who Killed the Catchphrase?” (Dec. 1, 2013)

El Pais (Spain): “Todos quieren (explotar) a Jonny Valentine” (Nov. 25, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Why I’m Opposed to Liz Cheney Marriage” (Nov. 19, 2013)

Esquire (Spain): “¿Quién es Jonny Valentine?” (Nov. 18, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Wheels” (Nov. 18, 2013)

New York Times Op-Ed: “My Kingdom for an English Course!” (Nov. 10, 2013)

The Millions: “The Lowest Form of Humor: How the National Lampoon Shaped the Way We Laugh Now” (Oct. 29, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Criticism” (Oct. 23, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Miss Winthrop’s Upper East Side Etiquette Academy for Gentlemen-in-Training’s Tips for the Mollification of Bullies” (Oct. 15, 2013)

New York Times Style: “Twitter Bios and What They Really Say” (Oct. 6, 2013)

GQ: “The Married Women of AshleyMadison.com” (Oct. 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Uniqueness” (Oct. 2, 2013)

New York Times Style: “Hate-Reading: Love to Loathe You, Baby” (Sept. 22, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Rain” (Sept. 19, 2013)

Salon: interview with Alice McDermott, Kathryn Davis, Lauren Grodstein, Anne Swärd, and Eric Lundgren (Sept. 17, 2013)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Explaining Twerking to Your Parents” (Sept. 1, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Supper” (Aug. 27, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Publicity II” (Aug. 14, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Dear Camp Belton Parents” (July 31, 2013)

Prospect (UK): “Other Controversial Florida Laws” (July 26, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Borders” (July 22, 2013)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine is released in the UK (July 18, 2013)

Du Jour: “The Kids Are Not Alright” (July 18, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Thickness” (July 10, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Experience” (June 28, 2013)

Salon: “Sex, Spider-Man and the hubris of being a writer” (June 24, 2013)

Barnes & Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Ordinary Joe” (June 17, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Aiming” (June 14, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Desperation” (June 7, 2013)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Eight Rules for Writing Fiction” (June 6, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Opportunity II” (May 31, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Both Sides, Now” (May 23, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Coincidence” (May 22, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Temerity” (May 14, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Months” (Apr. 30, 2013)

The Washington Post: review (Apr. 19, 2013)

GQ: Parting Shot: “Style Bible” (Apr. 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Friendship II” (Apr. 17, 2013)

New York Times Book Review: “Grave New World” (Apr. 14, 2013)

Huffington Post: James Franco reviews The Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Apr. 12, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “North Korean Propaganda Embraces Mumblecore” (Apr. 1, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Foolishness” (Apr. 1, 2013)

New York Times Style: “Justin Bieber and Youth’s New Wilderness” (Mar. 31, 2013)

Wall Street Journal: “Freud Would Have Had a Field Day” (Mar. 29, 2013)

Amazon.com Omnivoracious: “Drinks with Teddy Wayne, Author of The Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Mar. 28, 2013)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “I Work Hard and I Play Soft” (Mar. 25, 2013)

New York Times Style: “Obsessed? You’re Not Alone” (Mar. 24, 2013)

London Review of Books: “Ich bin ein Belieber” (Mar. 21, 2013)

Vanity Fair: interview (Mar. 20, 2013)

New York Daily News: “‘Love Song’ Strikes a Chord” (Mar. 18, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs” (Mar. 18, 2013)

WUTC: NPR station interview (Mar. 15)

Downpour.com: interview (Mar. 15, 2013)

New York Magazine: Grub Street Diet (Mar. 15, 2013)

Los Angeles Review of Books: interview (Mar. 14, 2013)

SF Bay Guardian: “Bieb’s Collapse, Predicted in Literary Form” (Mar. 12, 2013)

Folha de S. Paolo (Brazil): “Livro compara Justin Bieber a personagem de J.D. Salinger” (Mar. 12, 2013)

Folha de S. Paolo (Brazil): “Michael Jackson influenciou personagem de Teddy Wayne” (Mar. 11, 2013)

Salon: interview (Mar. 8, 2013)

WBEZ: interview (Mar. 8, 2013)

New York Times Book Review Essay: “By Any Other Name” (Mar. 3, 2013)

New York Times Styles: “The No-Limits Job” (Mar. 3, 2013)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine named a New York Times Editors’ Choice (Mar. 3, 2013)

Arizona Republic: March Book Pick (Mar. 3, 2013)

Tampa Bay Times: review (Mar. 1, 2013)

The Hairpin: “The Girl Next Door” (Feb. 28, 2013)

BOMB: interview (Feb. 28, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Austerity” (Feb. 28, 2013)

New York Times Book Review: cover review (Feb. 24, 2013)

New York Times Book Review: podcast interview (Feb. 24, 2013)

New York Times Opinionator: “Tips for Public Speaking” (Feb. 24, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “The Smell of a Book” (Feb. 20, 2013)

The New Yorker: “Withholding” (Feb. 19, 2013)

St. Louis Post-Dispatch: review (Feb. 17, 2013)

Rolling Stone: “My Day at the Grammys With Hunter Hayes” (Feb. 15, 2013)

People: review (print-only) (Feb. 25, 2013)

Library Journal: starred review (Feb. 15, 2013)

WNYC Soundcheck: interview (Feb. 14, 2013)

Time Out New York: review (Feb. 14, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Love III” (Feb. 14, 2013)

The Millions: review (Feb. 13, 2013)

The Los Angeles Times: interview (Feb. 12, 2013)

Largehearted Boy: playlist (Feb. 12, 2013)

NPR All Things Considered: interview (Feb. 9, 2013)

The Wall Street Journal: review (Feb. 8, 2013)

Shelf Awareness: interview (Feb. 8, 2013)

Bookreporter.com: review (Feb. 8, 2013)

The Boston Globe: review (Feb. 7, 2013)

Newsday: review (Feb. 7, 2013)

PBS: interview (Feb. 6, 2013)

The Awl: excerpt of The Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Feb. 5, 2013)

The Millions: interview (Feb. 5, 2013)

Splitsider: interview (Feb. 5, 2013)

Boston Phoenix: review (Feb. 5, 2013)

Bookish: “Teddy Wayne’s Favorite Reads on Rock Fame and Fandom” (Feb. 5, 2013)

The Leonard Lopate Show: interview (Feb. 4, 2013)

Oprah.com: Book of the Week pick (Feb. 4, 2013)

New York Daily News: review (Feb. 4, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “I’m an English Professor in a Movie” (Feb. 4, 2013)

USA Today: The Love Song of Jonny Valentine listed in new and noteworthy books (Feb. 3, 2013)

The Morning News: “When Writers Sing” (recorded versions of “Guys vs. Girls”) (Feb. 1, 2013)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine named BookPage‘s Fiction Top Pick for February (Feb. 2013)

BookPage: Interview (Feb. 2013)

Barnes & Noble Review: Interview (Feb. 1, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Zeal” (Jan. 30, 2013)

New York Times: Michiko Kakutani review of The Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Jan. 29, 2013)

The Daily Beast: Review of The Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Jan. 29, 2013)

NPR.org: “‘Emmanuelle’ and the Seductive Power of Words” (Jan. 27, 2013)

VICE: Review of The Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Jan. 27, 2013)

Interview: interview (Feb. 2013)

Details: #1 on Yes List (Feb. 2013)

New York Observer: Profile (Jan. 23, 2013)

Standard Culture: Interview (Jan. 23, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Modesty” (Jan. 23, 2013)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Forget the Oscars—It’s the Teachies!” (Jan. 13, 2013)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Lost Civilization” (Jan. 11, 2013)

Variety: article on the self-aware marketing campaign for the novel (Jan. 10, 2013)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine named in The Atlantic‘s Winter 2013 Books Preview (Jan. 7, 2013)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine named one of The Millions’s most-anticipated books of 2013 (Jan. 7, 2013)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Practice” (Jan. 7, 2013)

New York Times Style: “What Will Induce Nostalgia in 2033?” (Jan. 6, 2013)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Second Thoughts” (Jan. 4, 2013)

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine named to the Indie Next List for February 2013

The Love Song of Jonny Valentine named one of BookPage‘s 20 most-anticipated books of 2013

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Seasonality” (Dec. 20, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Difference” (Dec. 14, 2012)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Infants’ and Toddlers’ Facebook Posts About Their Parents” (Dec. 11, 2012)

The National (UAE) review: “Coming-of-age novel set in the brutal world of showbiz” (Dec. 8, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Children” (Dec. 6, 2012)

Publishers Weekly gives a starred review to The Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Dec. 3, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Errors” (Nov. 26, 2012)

Kirkus Reviews gives a starred review to The Love Song of Jonny Valentine (Nov. 15, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Kindness” (Nov. 12, 2012)

BookPage preview of 2013 fiction (Oct. 29, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Work” (Oct. 30, 2012)

New York Times Opinionator: “Flu Season Health Precautions” (Oct. 22, 2012)

Prospect (UK): “Election: The Board Game” (Nov. 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Earning” (Oct. 17, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Brand-Name Author” (Oct. 11, 2012)

90 Days, 90 Reasons: “Reason 61: Big Bird’s Response to Mitt Romney, As Told To Teddy Wayne” (Oct. 7, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Cats” (Oct. 1, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Enemies” (Sept. 19, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Honesty” (Sept. 5, 2012)

Library Journal: Prepublication preview of The Love Song of Jonny Valentine

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: News” (Aug. 22, 2012)

Bloomberg BusinessWeek: “A Brooklyn Restaurant Literally Goes Whole Hog” (Aug. 8, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Similarity” (Aug. 8, 2012)

Psychology Today: “Final Analysis: Notes on My Dream Home” (July 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Volume” (July 27, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Prevention II” (July 18, 2012)

Teddy Wayne named New York Foundation for the Arts finalist in fiction (July 12, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Commonality” (June 19, 2012)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “The Thumb-Drive Supremacy” (June 13, 2012)

Bloomberg BusinessWeek: “Captain Morgan’s Search for the Real Morgan’s Brand Treasure” (June 5, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Realism” (May 30, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Pictures” (May 23, 2012)

GQ: “In an Alternate Dimension, We Talk to the Creator of Showtime’s Acclaimed Series Boys (May 15, 2012)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “I’m an Article About the Internet That You Repost on the Internet” (May 14, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Reciprocity II” (May 14, 2012)

Teddy Wayne’s second novel, The Love Song of Jonny Valentine, to be published by Simon & Schuster/Free Press in Spring 2013 (Apr. 30, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Influence” (Apr. 30, 2012)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Weapons of Peculiar Destruction” (Apr. 29, 2012)

Vanity Fair: “Which Classic TV Character Are You?” (Apr. 10, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Comparisons” (Apr. 9, 2012)

New York Times Op-Ed: “A Fly Crawls Into a Bar…” (Mar. 25, 2012)

New York Times Style: “A Smartphone Future? But Not Yet” (Mar. 25, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Domiciles” (Mar. 19, 2012)

Bloomberg BusinessWeek: “Gourmet Dog Food: A Taste Test” (Mar. 16, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Condo President-for-Life” (Mar. 14, 2012)

GQ (Spain): Kapitoil—Libro de la Semana (Mar. 5, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Variety” (Mar. 5, 2012)

Bloomberg BusinessWeek: “The ‘Heart Attack Grill’ Experience” (Feb. 16, 2012)

BCNcultura.cat (Spain): “El Sentit Del Capitalisme” (Feb. 15, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Love II” (Feb. 14, 2012)

Dominical (Spain): “El nuevo héroe del 11-S” (Feb. 5, 2012)

Esquire (Spain): “Libros sobre la crisis y para olvidarla” (Feb. 2012)

Go Mag (Spain): “American Most Wanted” (Feb. 3, 2012)

Kapitoil named the 2012 Fiction: New Voices selection for Read St. Louis (Jan. 30, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Planning” (Jan. 30, 2012)

Prospect (UK): “The Romney-tron” (Jan. 25, 2012)

La Vanguardia: “‘Kapitoil,’ cuando las palabras se convertien en dinero del petróleo” (Jan. 18, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Punctuality” (Jan. 17, 2012)

El Periódico: “El Libro de la Semana: Como un número primo” (Jan. 11, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Silence” (Jan. 9, 2012)

El Mundo: “Wayne, Un ‘Kapitoil’ Brutal y el mundo antes del 11-S” (Jan. 5, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Aliens With Benefits” (Jan. 5, 2012)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Gifts” (Dec. 22, 2011)

Vanity Fair: “Occupy the North Pole” (Dec. 19, 2011)

Público (Spain): “‘Kapitoil’, una novela para entender el 11-S (y el ‘crash’ financiero)” (Dec. 17, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Writing” (Dec. 9, 2011)

The Awl: “My Three-Month Facebook Dialogue With A Scammer From Malaysian Pretending To Be A Beautiful Woman” (Dec. 6, 2011)

The Morning News: “The Luxe Love Life of Veronica van der Vöorhies” (Nov. 29, 2011)

Kapitoil published in Spain by Blackie Books (Nov. 2011)

Kapitoil featured as lead title in Spanish Vanity Fair (Nov. 2011)

Bloomberg BusinessWeek: “Great Moments in YouTube Celebrity” (Nov. 17, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Autonomy” (Nov. 16, 2011)

Barnes & Noble Grin & Tonic: “Live-Blogging the New Mead Unveiling” (Nov. 11, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Collaboration” (Nov. 2, 2011)

Bloomberg BusinessWeek: “Surviving White-Collar Prison” (Oct. 27, 2011)

Teddy Wayne announced winner of 2011 Whiting Writers’ Award (Oct. 25, 2011); coverage in New York Times,New York Daily News, and Associated Press

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Genius” (Oct. 19, 2011)

Barnes & Noble Grin & Tonic: “A Farewell to Pigskin” (Oct. 14, 2011)

Salon: “It’s a protest. It’s not Woodstock” (Oct. 10, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Occupy Main Street!” (Oct. 7, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Leadership” (Sept. 27, 2011)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Signing Off” (Sept. 23, 2011)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “American Dream” (Sept. 12, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Repetition” (Sept. 12, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Money” (Aug. 29, 2011)

Teddy Wayne named finalist for the 2011 Dayton Literary Peace Prize (Aug. 24, 2011)

ZDNet UK: Kapitoil review (Aug. 24, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Skies” (Aug. 19, 2011)

Kapitoil nominated for the 2011 Dayton Literary Peace Prize (Aug. 15, 2011)

Teddy Wayne named 2011 PEN/Robert W. Bingham Prize runner-up (Aug. 10, 2011)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Hacking the Local News” (Aug. 10, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Self-Sufficiency” (Aug. 8, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Recognition” (July 25, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Reticence” (July 11, 2011)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Like It or Unfriend It” (July 4, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Teaching” (June 27, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Word Up, Kids, and Guzzle Down the Stiffest Energy Drink Out There, FLACCID! (June 17, 2011)

Vanity Fair: “Quiz: Who’s Your Hollywood or TV Dad?” (June 16, 2011)

Prospect (UK): Response to “In the Shadow of the Twin Towers” (June 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Dog of War” (June 1, 2011)

Vanity Fair: “Memorable Senior Pranks” (May 30, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Guests” (May 24, 2011)

The Morning News: “An Open Letter to Writers of Open Letters” (May 20, 2011)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Web Critics Sum It All Up in a Word” (May 16, 2011)

Obit Magazine: “Advance Obituary for the 2011 New York Mets” (May 12, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Foresight” (May 11, 2011)

New York Times Drilling Down: “The Partisan Corners of the News” (May 9, 2011)

New York Times Drilling Down: “One Log-In Catches on for Many Sites” (May 2, 2011)

The Source Weekly: “The Read of the Town: Teddy Wayne on race, New York City and having his novel, Kapitoil, chosen as this year’s Novel Idea book” (Apr. 27, 2011)

The Oregonian: Kapitoil review: Adventures in narration: A first novel follows a grand tradition” (Apr. 23, 2011)

Bend Bulletin: Kapitoil author to make 3 appearances in Central Oregon” (Apr. 23, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Change” (Apr. 21, 2011)

Wall Street Journal: “My Brush with the Pale King” (Apr. 18, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Turmoil” (Apr. 4, 2011)

Bend Bulletin: Kapitoil—Novel Idea events start this week with book discussions” (Apr. 2, 2011)

Teddy Wayne named a finalist for the New York Public Library’s 2011 Young Lions Fiction Award (Mar. 29, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Consolidation” (Mar. 23, 2011)

Deschutes County “A Novel Read” events for Kapitoil posted (Mar. 17, 2011)

Spanish rights to Kapitoil sold to Blackie Books (Mar. 16, 2011)

Obit Magazine: “Remembering a Suburban Icon” (Mar. 15, 2011)

New York Daily News Op-Ed: “Why should I care about oil? It’s much easier to watch Charlie Sheen” (Mar. 14, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Linkage” (Mar. 14, 2011)

Excerpt of Kapitoil on The Awl (Mar. 7, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Publicity” (Mar. 1, 2011)

Writer’s Digest: “Publicity Tips When Publishing Your Book” (Feb. 26, 2011)

The Awl: “How ‘CSI: NY’ Most Definitely Didn’t Steal My Story” (Feb. 22, 2011)

Kapitoil to face Jonathan Franzen’s Freedom in opening game of The Morning News Tournament of Books 2011(Feb. 21, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Craftsmanship” (Feb. 14, 2011)

GQ UK: Godfather IV as Directed by Wes Anderson” (Feb. 2011)

McSweeney’s: Burning Bright Not Good Enough, Must Burn Brightest: Lessons from a Tigress Mother on Whelping Alpha Cubs, by A. Panthera” (Jan. 31, 2011)

NEA Writers’ Corner: Teddy Wayne (Jan. 24, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Conclusiveness” (Jan. 24, 2011)

Kapitoil selected for The Morning News Tournament of Books 2011 (Jan. 20, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Doggedness” (Jan. 12, 2011)

Today Show: “For these men, money bought brides, not sex” (segment based on Bloomberg BusinessWeekarticle) (Jan. 11, 2011)

Bloomberg BusinessWeek: “The Mail-Order Bride Trade Is Flourishing” (Jan. 5, 2011)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Resilience” (Jan. 3, 2011)

The Jewish Chronicle (UK): review (Dec. 28, 2010)

Mediabistro Galleycat: “How Business School Applications Inspired a Debut Novel” (Dec. 28, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Age Gap Narrows on Social Networks” (Dec. 27, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “In Online Ads, Celebrities Fall Short” (Dec. 20, 2010)

Kapitoil longlisted to The Morning News 2011 Tournament of Books (Dec. 15, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Hesitation” (Dec. 15, 2010)

The Independent (UK): review (Dec. 14, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Digital Divide Is a Matter of Income” (Dec. 13, 2010)

The Morning News: “JuniorHighLeaks” (Dec. 9, 2010)

WNYC: “Writers Discuss Dreams and Ambitions at Happy Ending” (recording) (Dec. 7, 2010)

Kapitoil named one of Largehearted Boy‘s Favorite Novels of 2010 (Dec. 6, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Athletes’ Soul-Searching Begets Spoofs” (Dec. 6, 2010)

Rolling Stone (France): review (Dec. 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Laughter” (Nov. 29, 2010)

Ouest-France (France): “Teddy Wayne a le pétrole et des idées” (Nov. 28, 2010)

Vanity Fair: “Venal Colony” (Nov. 25, 2010)

Kapitoil named one of the Kansas City Star‘s Top 100 Books of the Year (Nov. 24, 2010)

The Riverdale Press: “Riverdale Writer’s Novel Named Among Top 10 Titles” (Nov. 17, 2010)

Kapitoil named one of The Huffington Post‘s 10 Best Books of the Year (Nov. 9, 2010)

Kapitoil is the 2011 “A Novel Idea” selection for Deschutes County, Oregon

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Loaning” (Nov. 8, 2010)

FHM (France): review (Nov. 2010)

Vanity Fair: “Carl Paladino’s Points of Pride” (Oct. 29, 2010)

France TV5: La Grande Librairie sur TV5 avec Salman Rushdie, Philip Roth, Louise Erdrich, Jerome Charyn, Teddy Wayne, Jay McInerney et Colum McCann (Oct. 28, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Pickup Artists’ Favorite Discussion Topics” (Oct. 28, 2010)

GQ: “The Definitive Interview with Choire Sicha, Editor of The Awl, on the State of the Media, Writing, and New York” (Oct. 28, 2010)

The Huffington Post: “The Huffington Post Interviews Jennifer Armstrong, Author of ‘Why? Because We Still Like You'” (Oct. 28, 2010)

Kapitoil named to Booklist‘s Top 10 First Novels: 2010

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Loyalty” (Oct. 25, 2010)

City A.M. (UK): “A Qatari takes on Wall St.” (Oct. 21, 2010)

Bloomberg BusinessWeek: “Why Etiquette Schools Are Thriving” (Oct. 18, 2010)

Radio France interview with Tewfik Hakem (Oct. 14, 2010)

French translator of Kapitoil, Adélaïde Pralon, wins France’s Prix de la Traduction Pierre-François Caillé for her translation (Oct. 7, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Competitiveness” (Oct. 6, 2010)

Jonathan Franzen on Kapitoil in British GQ (Oct. 5, 2010)

Lire (France): “Teddy Wayne revisite Candide (Oct. 2010)

Vanity Fair: “Welcome to the New Facebook!” (Oct. 1, 2010)

Coolture (France): Livre du Jour (Oct. 1, 2010)

La Gazette Nord-Pas de Calais (France): review (Sept. 24, 2010)

Les Echoes (France): “Un Qatarien chez les requins” (Sept. 23, 2010)

La Vie (France): review (Sept. 23, 2010)

The Morning News: “Bret Easton Ellis, Author Célèbre” (Sept. 22, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Hygiene” (Sept. 22, 2010)

Les Inrockuptibles (France): “Karim perdu dans Manhattan” (Sept. 2010)

Sud Ouest (France): “L’essence d’une époque” (Sept. 19, 2010)

Le Figaro Magazine (France): “Candide chez les traders” (Sept. 18, 2010)

Chronic’art (France): review (Sept. 17, 2010)

La Tribune (France): “Temps de Crise” (Sept. 16, 2010)

Mediabistro Galleycat: “5 Debut Novelists Share Thoughts on Writing & Publishing” (Sept. 13, 2010)

France 2 (France): “Kapitoil, un Arabe à New York avant le 11 septembre” (Sept. 11, 2010)

Spirit (France): review (Sept. 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Stupidity” (Sept. 7, 2010)

TéléZ (France): review (Sept. 6, 2010)

Grazia (France): review (Sept. 3, 2010)

Causette (France): round-up (Sept.-Oct. 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Other Hallowed-Ground Prohibitions” (Sept. 3, 2010)

Le Monde (France): “Trader et philanthrope” (review) (Sept. 2, 2010)

Kapitoil released in France by Liana Levi (Sept. 2, 2010)

The Daily Beast: “Jonathan Franzen’s Book Picks” (Aug. 31, 2010)

Bloomberg Businessweek: “What’s New for Weekend Warriors: Extreme Adventures” (Aug. 30, 2010)

L’Internaute (France): review (Aug. 25, 2010)

GQ: “SEX! Now That We’ve Gotten Your Porn Search, the New Self-Help Parody Sex: Our Bodies, Our Junk(Aug. 24, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Prevention” (Aug. 23, 2010)

Livres Hebdo (France): “Pétrole, pétrole” (Aug. 20, 2010)

Wall Street Journal: “My Socialist Summer Camp: Writer Teddy Wayne Looks Back” (Aug. 17, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Less Web Access Among Chronically Ill” (Aug. 16, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Women Set the Pace as Online Gamers” (Aug. 9, 2010)

GQ: “The Least Twee McSweeney’s Writer Ever: John Brandon” (Aug. 6, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Savings” (Aug. 4, 2010)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “Postmadern Men” (Aug. 2, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Minorities Favor Phones in Using Web” (Aug. 2, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Letter to McSweeney’s (Issue 35, July 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Why Elite Shoppers Eschew Logos” (July 26, 2010)

Five Chapters: “What a Good Boy” (July 26-30, 2010)

Kapitoil released in the UK and Commonwealth by Duckworth Publishers (July 22, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “My Favorite Things 2.0” (July 20, 2010)

Writer’s Digest: “How I Got My Agent: Teddy Wayne” (July 20, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Where the Bloggers Are Concentrated” (July 19, 2010)

Time: “What To Read This Summer” (July 15, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “U.S. History According to Mapquest” (July 15, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Confidentiality Notice” (July 13, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Most Smartphones Are Underused” (July 12, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Love” (July 8, 2010)

The L Magazine: “Teddy Wayne Can No Longer Watch Charles in Charge Reruns” (July 7, 2010)

GQ: “Q+A: HowAboutWe Reinvent Internet Dating” (July 6, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “On Twitter, a Close-Knit Network” (July 5, 2010)

Time: “Bestselling Authors Recommend Summer Books” (July 3, 2010)

Vanity Fair: “The Suburban Spy Transcripts” (July 1, 2010)

Edmonton SEE: “The Kapitoil Assignment” (July 1, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Subtext” (July 1, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Okay, America: We’re Turning Everything into Vampires” (June 30, 2010)

GQ: “Q+A: Electric Literature” (June 29, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Online Video’s Appeal Is Often Comic” (June 28, 2010)

Minyanville: “‘Veiled Agendas’ of News Stories — and Oil Traders” (June 25, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Maxim Profiles Esther Rosenbaum” (June 24, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Knowledge” (June 23, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Your Facebook Colonoscopy” (June 21, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Phone Style Says Something About You” (June 21, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Managing Reputations on Social Sites” (June 14, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Calling the World Cup” (June 11, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Destinations” (June 9, 2010)

The Huffington Post: “The Best Post-9/11 Novel: Huffington Post Interviews Teddy Wayne, Author of Kapitoil(June 7, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Settling In for Longer Videos Online” (June 7, 2010)

Largehearted Boy: “Book Notes – Teddy Wayne (Kapitoil)” (June 4, 2010)

The New York Observer: “If He Told All…” (June 1, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Absence” (June 1, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Online Buzz Doesn’t Equate to Ratings” (May 31, 2010)

BlackBook: “Author Teddy Wayne on His New Book Kapitoil (May 26, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Teenagers Text More Than They Call” (May 24, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Rules and Regulations for Benehmen!, the German Board Game of Discipline” (May 21, 2010)

Wall Street Journal: “How Business Jargon Inspired a New Novel” (May 18, 2010)

Time Out New York: “Off-page with Teddy Wayne” (May 20-26, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Positive Results for Online Government” (May 17, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “The Rejection of Anne Frank” (May 13, 2010)

Vanity Fair: “Congratulations (Sort Of)” (May 10, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Reciprocity” (May 10, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Awareness of Twitter Climbs Quickly” (May 10, 2010)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Date With a Neanderthal” (May 9, 2010)

Impose Magazine: “5 Best Things Teddy Wayne Has Read Recently” (May 7, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Coupons Are Making a Comeback” (May 2, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Procrastination” (Apr. 26, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “A Milestone for Internet Ad Revenue” (Apr. 26, 2010)

The Rumpus: “The Rumpus Interview with David Goodwillie and Teddy Wayne” (Apr. 22, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Director’s Commentary” (Apr. 20, 2010)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Falling Sales for the Printed Word” (Apr. 19, 2010)

GQ: “Found Document of the Day: Preliminary Notes Toward My Wall Street Novel, Kapitoil (Apr. 16, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “The Most Radical, Bitchin’, Totally Awesome Retro Prom Ever!” (Apr. 16, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Bad Publicity” (Apr. 14, 2010)

Forward: “Debut Novel Kapitoil Produces a Surprisingly Likeable Jewess” (Apr. 14, 2010)

Electric Literature: Excerpt from Kapitoil (Apr. 13, 2010)

McSweeney’s:Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Pleasures” (Apr. 13, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “The New Publishing” (Apr. 13, 2010)

GQ: “The First Funny Novel About Oil” (Apr. 13, 2010)

Vanity Fair: With Kapitoil, Teddy Wayne Invents—and Perfects!—the Pre-9/11 Novel” (Apr. 12, 2010)

Harper Perennial Fifty-Two Stories: “Therese Says” (Apr. 5, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Tax, Man” (Apr. 5, 2010)

McSweeney’s:Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Perfection” (Mar. 31, 2010)

McSweeney’s:Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Necessity” (Mar. 22, 2010)

GQ: “Q+A: Nora Kirkpatrick, Renaissance Woman” (Mar. 15, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Dating Me: A Scouting Report” (Mar. 11, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Deception” (Mar. 8, 2010)

The Huffington Post: “Interview with filmmaker Kentucker Audley” (Mar. 8, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Laughter” (Feb. 26, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “My Public Apology” (Feb. 26, 2010)

Comedy Central: (video) “The Worst Speeches of All Time: The Megan Fox Platform” (Feb. 16, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Subject-Verb Disagreements” (Feb. 11, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Accuracy” (Feb. 11, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “It’s a Hellish World After All” (Feb. 8, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Overlooked (For a Reason) Super Bowl Moments” (Feb. 6, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Out of Print” (Feb. 1, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Some Other Monologues” (Jan. 28, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Welcome to George and Cindy’s Divorce Proceedings Website!” (Jan. 26, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Prejudice” (Jan. 26, 2010)

USA Today Op-Ed: “Social Media is Ushering in the Death of Authenticity” (Jan. 20, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Sequentiality” (Jan. 13, 2010)

The Huffington Post: “Interview with Jami Attenberg, Author of ‘The Melting Season'” (Jan. 11, 2010)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Second Opinion” (Jan. 6, 2010)

The New York Times Drilling Down: “A Toast to Advances in Technology” (Jan. 3, 2010)

McSweeney’s: “New Year’s Resolutions” (Dec. 31, 2009)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “Pledge Week, 2039” (Dec. 30, 2009)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “The e-back®: CAMOUFLAGE FOR YOUR E-READER” (Dec. 28, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “TV Ad Revenue Slips, but Hope Persists” (Dec. 28, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Enhancement” (Dec. 22, 2009)

Comedy Central: (video) “The Worst Speeches of All Time: Girl Ruins Christmas Mass” (Dec. 21, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Spending Less and Looking for Deals” (Dec. 21, 2009)

Barnes and Noble Review Grin & Tonic: “I, HORPA” (Dec. 16, 2009)

Harper Perennial Olive Reader: “Holiday Grab Bag” (Dec. 16, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Digital Habits Shift Across Age Groups” (Dec. 14, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Inferiority” (Dec. 11, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Web Shopping Rush Sticks to Top Sites” (Dec. 7, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “I Need to Improve My Responses to Hecklers” (Dec. 7, 2009)

Minyanville: “Breathe in One Billion, Breathe Out One Billion” (Dec. 3, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Cash in the Forefront for the Holidays” (Nov. 30, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Brevity” (Nov. 23, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Motion” (Nov. 10, 2009)

Minyanville: “Why Authors Skip Hardback, Too” (Nov. 10, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Unity” (Oct. 21, 2009)

Significant Objects: “Wave Box” (Oct. 7, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Imitation” (Oct. 5, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Arse Poetica” (Oct. 2, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Solitude” (Sept. 18, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Precautions” (Sept. 1, 2009)

Comedy Central: (video) “The Worst Speeches of All Time: Ashton Kutcher Fan Fiction” (Aug. 31, 2009)

Comedy Central/Atom Films: (video) “The Worst Speeches of All Time: Pro Wrestler’s PTA Campaign” (Aug. 31, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Enticement” (Aug. 17, 2009)

Vanity Fair: “The Summer of Love 2.009” (Aug. 12, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Microsoft Entourage” (Aug. 3, 2009)

The Faster Times: “The Decimation of the New York Mets Active Roster Continues Unabated” (July 28, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Stoicism” (July 23, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Vengeance” (July 9, 2009)

The Huffington Post: “Interview with Mike Sacks, Author of “And Here’s the Kicker” (July 9, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Heart” (June 23, 2009)

The Huffington Post: “J.D. California is a Goddam Thief Who Ripped Me Off, Too” (June 18, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Easy Instructions for the Conversion to Digital TV” (June 12, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Perseverance” (June 5, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “The Power of a Nudge Toward Thrift” (May 25, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Social Networks Eclipse E-Mail” (May 18, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Caution” (May 18, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Twitter’s Trouble With Repeat Users” (May 11, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “My Pitches for Political-Satire Skits Playing on President Obama’s Foibles Keep Getting Shot Down” (May 6, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “The Hispanic Audience Grows Online” (May 4, 2009)

New York Times Drilling Down: “Small Ticket vs. Big Ticket Ad Buying” (Apr. 27, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Wisdom” (Apr. 27, 2009)

Tar Art: “Woody Allen Reassures a Neurotic Nation on the Economy” (Spring 2009)

Vanity Fair: “For College Students, Getting Accepted Ain’t What It Used To Be” (Apr. 15, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Free Will” (Apr. 6, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Saved by the Bell: The Grad School Years” (Mar. 23, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Self-Reliance” (Mar. 16, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Freedom” (Feb. 24, 2009)

The New Yorker Shouts & Murmurs: “A 16th-Century Actor Suffers a Meltdown at London’s Globe Theatre” (Feb. 13, 2009)

The Forward: “A Book of Insults—Exploring Yiddish Curses” (Feb. 12, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Opportunity” (Feb. 3, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “Teddy Wayne’s Unpopular Proverbs: Friendship” (Jan. 22, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “From The Clog: Manchester, Vermont’s Insider Gossip Blog for Plumbers” (Jan. 13, 2009)

McSweeney’s: “New Year’s Resolutions” (Dec. 31, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “Your Best Friend in a Romantic Comedy Is Always There For You” (Dec. 4, 2008)

Vanity Fair: “Pardon Me” (Nov. 26, 2008)

Vanity Fair: “John McCain’s Rejected Concession Speeches” (Nov. 4, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “The Audacity of Despair” (Oct. 28, 2008)

Radar: (video) “Sarah Meets Woody” (Oct. 22, 2008)

Radar: “Adult Friends Forever” (Oct. 21, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “Your Candidate for Class Treasurer Has Something to Disclose” (Oct. 8, 2008)

The Huffington Post: “The Art of Losing: Americans’ Fixation on Winning Personalities” (Sept. 25, 2008)

David Foster Wallace-related material: undergraduate thesis on Infinite Jest from 2001; affectionate parody from 2005

The Huffington Post: “Goobama: Obama is the Google Candidate” (Sept. 9, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “Soberly Written Documents Rendered as Comic-Book Dialogue!” (Aug. 7, 2008)

MSNBC: News segment on 23/6‘s “Gaffe Track (Club Remix Feat. DJ Barry O.)” (July 17, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “A Former WWF Wrestler, Now a Surburban Realtor and Parent of Three, Campaigns for PTA Chair and Battles His Instincts” (June 10, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “Top Searches on Gogol.com” (June 5, 2008)

Radar: “Family Values” (June 3, 2008)

The New Yorker: “The Book Bench: Books About Books” (May 16, 2008)

Esquire Back Page: “Great Works of Literature as Text Messages” (June 2008)

McSweeney’s: “The Catcher in the Retirement Home” (Apr. 17, 2008)

McSweeney’s: Three pieces anthologized in The McSweeney’s Joke Book of Book Jokes, available from Random House/Vintage (Apr. 1, 2008)

Vanity Fair: “Have You Two Met?” (Mar. 19, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “‘Page Six’ Gets Extremely Personal” (Mar. 11, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “Ashton Kutcher Fan Fiction: ‘The Middle School Dance’ by Melissa Bell, Age 13” (Feb. 7, 2008)

Esquire Back Page: “Physical-Therapy Exercises for Other Injurious Situations” (Feb. 2008)

McSweeney’s: “Ishmael The Comedian” (Jan. 9, 2008)

McSweeney’s: “An Inarticulate, Self-Consciously Ironic Voice of His Twentysomething Generation Makes an Opening Statement for His Client in a Corporate-Fraud Case” (Nov. 13, 2007)

McSweeney’s: “We’re Huge in Europe” (Oct. 2, 2007)

Radar: “Antique Roadshow: Q&A With Millard Kaufman” (Sept. 9, 2007)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Monday Night Existentialism” (Sept. 8, 2007)

McSweeney’s: “Debate for Emperor of the Upsilon Sigma Star System” (Aug. 27, 2007)

McSweeney’s: “Why There Will Never Be a Lactose-Intolerant President” (Aug. 6, 2007)

McSweeney’s: “Ivan Lendl, Former Tennis Champion and Current Landscape-Painting Teacher in the Goshen, Connecticut, Community Center” (June 1, 2007)

New York Times Op-Ed: “Red Carpets Through History” (May 27, 2007)

McSweeney’s: “Planned Parenthood’s Plans C, D, E, F, and G for Iraqi Insurgent Control” (Apr. 13, 2007)

Los Angeles Times Op-Ed: “A Whole New Ballgame” (Apr. 1, 2007)

Esquire Back Page: “The Kama Sutra: The Corrections” (Apr. 2007)

New York Times Op-Ed: (with Greg Wayne) “It’s Fantasy Office 2007” (Mar. 30, 2007)

Radar: “Sindergarten” – April Fool’s hoax under pseudonym Edward Wain + Hoax Explanation (Mar. 30, 2007)

Time Print Essay: “Top 10 Best Sellers of 2027” (Mar. 26, 2007)

McSweeney’s: “My Interactive Call Center” (Mar. 23, 2007)

The Carolina Quarterly: “Page 88” (Spring 2007, Vol. 58, No. 2)

The Carolina Quarterly: “Plus or Minus One” (Spring 2007, Vol. 58, No. 2)

Time Print Essay: “The 2008 American Auto Show” (Mar. 5, 2007)

Radar: “Prank Call To Arms” (Jan. 26-27, 2007)

Time Print Essay: “New Emoticons for 2007” (Jan. 22, 2007)

New York Times Op-Ed: “The Election’s Most Personal Attack Ad” (Nov. 9, 2006)

Yankee Pot Roast: “How Various Michael J. Fox Roles Would Be Different Had Rush Limbaugh Instead Been Cast” (Nov. 1, 2006)

McSweeney’s: “I’m Starting to Suspect That a Dungeons and Dragons Player Named ‘Elgdorf the Mage’ Is Abusing His Wikipedia Editorial Privileges” (Oct. 26, 2006)

Yankee Pot Roast: “Less Overtly Salacious but More Incriminating Republican IM Transcripts” (Oct. 10, 2006)

Denver Quarterly: “Twenty-Six Sentences About Zelda” (Fall 2006, Vol. 41, No. 1)

The Onion: “Mister Rogers’ Neighborhood Gerrymandered To Serve King Friday’s Make-Believe Agenda”(headline only) (Sept. 19, 2006)

McSweeney’s: “Perhaps I Should Stop Naming the Protagonists in My Semi-Autobiographical Fiction After Myself”(Sept. 18, 2006)

Time: “Now, the Sequel to Lonelygirl15” (Sept. 13, 2006)

Time: “Sneak Preview: Ahmadinejad vs. Bush” (Aug. 29, 2006)

Time: “Taking the Paris Hilton Celibacy Challenge” (Aug. 8, 2006)

Time: “An Early 90s MTV VJ Gracelessly Transitions Into Life as a Delaware-Area Adult-Contemporary DJ” (Aug. 1, 2006)

Time: “Googling for the CIA” (June 23, 2006)

Time: “‘Hello, Mr. President. It’s Al Gore Calling'” (June 2, 2006)

Time: “That Magic 714” (May 23, 2006)

McSweeney’s: “Why There Aren’t Many Right-Wing Observational Comedians” (May 22, 2006)

Yankee Pot Roast: “Non-Celebrity Gawker Stalker” (May 16, 2006)

McSweeney’s: “Feedback From James Joyce’s Submission of Ulysses to His Creative-Writing Workshop” (May 9, 2006)

McSweeney’s: “Parallels Between My Living Through Two Years of Middle School and the Two Terms of the Bush Presidency” (Mar. 21, 2006)

McSweeney’s: “Listmania!: Other Books Useful (or Not) for Americans to Read, Beyond William Blum’s Rogue State, by Osama B-L” (Jan. 23, 2006)

McSweeney’s: “History’s Most Lopsided Trades, as Renegotiated by Oakland A’s General Manager Billy Beane”(Jan. 16, 2006)

McSweeney’s: “New Year’s Resolutions” (Jan. 6, 2006)

Vanity Fair: “Winono Forever” (Dec. 2006, p. 292)

McSweeney’s: “Ten Reasons Why You, Audrey Tautou, Gamine French Star of Amélie, Should Date Me, Teddy Wayne” (Oct. 24, 2005)

McSweeney’s: “Urgent Proposal” (Aug. 30, 2005)

McSweeney’s: “Where Are They Now?” (Aug. 9, 2005)

Yankee Pot Roast: “Judy and Jim in Paris” (July 14, 2005)

McSweeney’s: “Bawdy Best-Man Speeches, Given by the Actual Best Man on Earth at the Time” (June 9, 2005)

Yankee Pot Roast: “I Am Tom Cruise, and I Love Women” (June 7, 2005)

McSweeney’s: “Awkward Interloper of the Realm: Christmas Day With My New Girlfriend’s Family As a Circa-1982 Text-Based Computer Adventure Game” (May 23, 2005)

Yankee Pot Roast: “The Weatherman’s Weekend Forecast” (May 20, 2005)

Yankee Pot Roast: “The Night of Standup Comedy I Recently Saw, Reduced to Its Logical Abstractions, as per Freud’s Wit and Its Relation to the Unconscious (Apr. 20, 2005)

McSweeney’s: “Yahoo’s MAILER-DAEMON Automated Reply for Failed E-mail Delivery Is Getting a Little Too Intimate” (Apr. 12, 2005)

Yankee Pot Roast: “Temping in Vatican City” (Apr. 4, 2005)

Yankee Pot Roast: “Other Overwrought Acceptance Speeches” (Mar. 25, 2005)

McSweeney’s: “2008 Presidential Stump Speech of Billy Bush, Cousin of George W. Bush and Access HollywoodEntertainment Reporter” (Mar. 16, 2005)

Yankee Pot Roast: “David Foster Wallace, TV Guide Synopsist” (Feb. 17, 2005)

McSweeney’s: The Fabulous Friends: Conservative Christian Groups’ Least-Favorite All-Star Cartoon” (Jan. 27, 2005)

McSweeney’s: “Welcome to Cancún!” (Jan. 24, 2005)

McSweeney’s: “Johnson’s Life of Boswell (Dec. 15, 2004)