Author: Teddy Wayne

(Originally appeared in Radar on Oct. 21, 2008) In the past week, I have seen hundreds of vaginas—shaven and hirsute, flowering out like Georgia O’Keeffe paintings and demure as habited nuns; scores of aggressively turgid, rhizomatically veined penises; breasts of varying degrees of authenticity, proportion, and symmetry; and an emotionally scarring amount of anuses. For … Read More

(Originally appeared in Radar on June 3, 2008) Everyone knows that having a famous last name can score an unqualified scion plum Hollywood roles, corporate board seats—even the U.S. presidency (we’re looking your way, John Quincy Adams). But can it get you, a clown, a mime, and a magician a prime table at Spago Beverly … Read More

(Originally appeared in Radar on Sept. 10, 2007) Raymond Chandler was 51 when he published his first novel, The Big Sleep, in 1939.   Laura Ingalls Wilder didn’t get around to writing a book until age 65.  And Frank McCourt was 66 the year Angela’s Ashes became a bestseller. But in the late-bloomer category, Millard Kaufman … Read More

(Originally appeared in Radar on Aug. 6, 2007) Men will do anything for sex—even cybersex. In Second Life, the virtual-reality online environment populated by well over a million different users, one of the favorite pastimes is, predictably, sex. SL sex acts between “avatars,” user-modified animated characters, ranges from innocent cuddling to BDSM to the improbably … Read More

The Latest Craze For NYC’s Wealthy Teens Is Acting Like Little Children—While On Club Drug Foxy By Teddy Wayne (Originally appeared as an April Fool’s hoax in Radar on Mar. 30, 2007) By Edward Wain (aka Teddy Wayne) It’s 11:30 on a Friday, and a dozen students from Dalton, the elite Manhattan private school, are … Read More

(Originally appeared in Radar on Feb. 26, 2007) The Flaming Lips’s guest spot on Beverly Hills, 90210 (Steve Sanders’s painfully early-’90s pronouncement: “I’ve never been a big fan of alternative music, but these guys rocked the house!”) seemed harmless at the time, but let’s take stock of what that seminal moment has brought us in … Read More

(Originally appeared in Radar on Feb. 22, 2007) Behold the graveyard: Freaks and Geeks, which showed how the other half of high school lived in the Reagan era; creator Judd Apatow’s contemporary, collegiate update, Undeclared; Lisa Kudrow’s sitcom-within-a-reality-show- within-a-sitcom, The Comeback; and Wonderfalls, the quirky dramedy about a quasi-schizophrenic. All of these recent single-camera, laugh-trackless … Read More

(Originally appeared in Radar on Jan. 26-27, 2007) An overwhelmingly popular war…a maximum one-year tour of duty…and a hospitable Middle Eastern paradise. Military recruiters must be beating them off with an M16, right? To test this hypothesis, Radar’s Teddy Wayne called recruiting stations around the country disguised as a veritable Breakfast Club of misfit would-be … Read More